


stan loves me i promise

by eeveeivy



Category: IT, IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Adorable Georgie Denbrough, Ben Hanscom Loves Beverly Marsh, Beverly Marsh & Richie Tozier Are Best Friends, Beverly Marsh & Stanley Uris Are Best Friends, Beverly Marsh Knows Everything, Beverly Marsh Lives With Her Aunt, Beverly Marsh Ships It, Bisexual Beverly Marsh, Bisexual Bill Denbrough, Coming Out, Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier Being Idiots, Eventual Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Everyone is Gay Except Ben Hanscom, F/M, Gay Eddie Kaspbrak, Gay Richie Tozier, Georgie Denbrough Lives, Good Parents Maggie & Wentworth Tozier, Heterosexual Ben Hanscom, I Tried, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, Idiots in Love, Losers Club Group Chat (IT), M/M, Matchmaker Beverly Marsh, Mike Hanlon Deserves Nice Things, Mike Hanlon Loves Bill Denbrough, Mike Hanlon is a Good Friend, Nonbinary Character, Nonbinary Stanley Uris, One-Sided Attraction, Richie Tozier Flirts, Richie Tozier Is Smart, Richie Tozier is Actually Smart, Richie Tozier is a Dork, Richie Tozier is a Little Shit, Sassy Stanley Uris, Stanley Uris is So Done, THATS NOT THE TAG I MEANT TO PUT BUT YEAH IT WORKS, Tags Are Fun, Tags Are Hard, Tags May Change, Texting, There's A Tag For That, everyone loves stanley uris, i tagged a bunch of ships so you dont know whats endgame, i will probably add more tags later, shh it happens later on, the writer is not ;), theyre all idiots actually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-24
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:47:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 45
Words: 10,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23300404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eeveeivy/pseuds/eeveeivy
Summary: richie makes a losers groupchat--[richie] hey stanley your[richie] {picture of a bowl with dora on it}[richie] get it? a-dora-bowl?? like adorable ;))))[stanley] You’re*[richie] aww thanks babe[stanley] Don't call me that, we're not dating[richie] NOT YET!!![bill] r u guys done flirting--{finished, sequel coming out soon!}
Relationships: Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Bill Denbrough/Eddie Kaspbrak, Bill Denbrough/Mike Hanlon, Bill Denbrough/Richie Tozier, Bill Denbrough/Stanley Uris, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier/Stanley Uris, Eddie Kaspbrak/Stanley Uris, Mike Hanlon/Eddie Kaspbrak, Mike Hanlon/Stanley Uris, Richie Tozier/Stanley Uris
Comments: 114
Kudos: 255





	1. whh;a t if w e kk;ijsss ed nghh,; and h hheld hwands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay one of the tags says this but idk some people dont read tags-  
> i tagged a bunch of ships so u dont know whats endgame  
> enjoy ;)))

**5:17 PM**   
**bert - ernie**

  
[ernie] STANIEL :smirking:  
  
[bert] What  
  
[ernie] should i make a losers gc for everyone :grinning:  
  
[bert] That would be highly annoying  
  
[ernie] SO THATS A YES???? :red heart::red heart::red heart:  
  
[bert] No  
  
[bert] Richie don't  
  
[ernie] okay thanks bye stgan loe fyou  
  
[bert] I hate you  
  
[ernie] MUAH MWAH XOXOXOXO ;* ;* ;* :blowing a kiss:

  
\---

  
 **5:24 PM**  
 _richie added stanley, beverly, and 4 others!_  
 _richie named the chat "stan loves me i promise"_  
  
 **5:25 PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
[stanley] Oh God  
  
[richie] hi stanley :pleading::pleading::pleading:  
  
[mike] hello

  
_richie changed their name to "ten inch tozier"_

  
[ten inch tozier] hi mike :smiling face with squinting eyes:

  
_stanley changed ten inch tozier's name to "Annoying Baby"_

  
[Annoying Baby] OMG STANLEY THINKS IM BABY :pleading::red heart::smiling face with hearts:  
  
[stanley] Jesus Christ, why am I still friends with you  
  
[Annoying Baby] bc you love me right  
  
[bill] r u 2 done flirting???  
  
[beverly] aw come on bill you interrupted  
  
[eddie] anyways  
  
[mike] hey bill, hows georgie??  
  
[bill] he's sick rn :/  
  
[eddie] guys shut up my phone is blowing up and my mom's threatening to take it away  
  
[Annoying Baby] eddie!!!!!!!! everyone SHUT UP my spaghetti is here  
  
[eddie] ugh shut up richie  
  
[Annoying Baby] :pensive:

  
_eddie changed Annoying Baby's name to "trash"_   
  
_trash changed eddie's name to "trash collecter"_

  
[bill] will u 2 stop flirting god  
  
[stanley] You're just jealous that Richie isn't flirting with you  
  
[bill] beep beep stanley  
  
[trash] omg bill wants me to flirt with him  
  
[trash] i will gladly do so  
  
[bill] no please dont;;

  
_trash changed trash collecter's name to "raccoon"_   
  
_trash changed bill's name to "trash collecter"_

  
[raccoon] why am i raccoon  
  
[trash] bc raccoons eat trash  
  
[raccoon] THAT IS SO FREAKING DISGUSINF  
  
[beverly] wait what did i miss  
  
[stanley] Scroll up  
  
[beverly] oh? bill and richie?  
  
[mike] billchie  
  
[ben] bichie  
  
[raccoon] tozbrough  
  
[beverly] denzier  
  
[trash collecter] did u guys just.... make ship names...?  
  
[trash] thast s so sweweet;; nghh ,;; y oyuy g u yys ;s ;  
  
[mike] is that the cat meme  
  
[beverly] yes  
  
[trash] bbill ;;; whh;a t if w e kk;ijsss ed nghh,; and h hheld hwands  
  
[trash collecter] someone please stop this  
  
[stanley] Do you guys want to go to the quarry later?  
  
[beverly] can't, im helping clara with errands  
  
[mike] i would but vincent has been acting up  
  
[ben] i cant go, sorry stan  
  
[trash] i'll meet u there staniel  
  
[raccoon] i'll go too  
  
[trash collecter] me as well  
  
[trash] HELL YEAH CORE FOUR BAY BEEEEEEE  
  
[mike] has no one told richie he spelled collector wrong  
  
[trash] omg

  
_trash changed trash collecter's name to "trash collector"_

  
[beverly] straight a's yet manages to misspell the easiest words  
  
[raccoon] it remains a mystery


	2. xXg4m3rb0i42069Xx

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> bill's typing is horrendous but he's upset about stanley's typing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> XD !!

**2:55AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
[trash collector] i h8 the way th@ stanley types  
  
[beverly] hello????? it’s 3am????????? why are you awake????????????????  
  
[raccoon] stan’s typing has kept him up  
  
[trash collector] the capitalization............  
  
[raccoon] he’s been texting me about it all night  
  
[beverly] u guys are weird  
  
[ben] uh. it’s three in the morning. everyone go to sleep  
  
[trash collector] no i  
  
[trash collector] i*  
  
[trash collector] I**  
  
[raccoon] take ur time  
  
[trash collector] U*****  
  
[trash collector] I MEANT NO U WTF  
  
[ben] i was asleep and my ringer went off  
  
[trash collector] XDDD get rekt   
  
[raccoon] bill could’ve been so attractive but he texts like that  
  
[beverly] unfortunately true  
  
[trash collector] i’m right here wtf stop talking about me like i can’t read it  
  
  
 _raccoon changed trash collector’s name to “xXg4m3rb0i42069Xx”_  
  
  
[beverly] PFKSLDJKESHA THATS EXACTLY WHAT HE COMES OFF AS  
  
[xXg4m3rb0i42069Xx] i h8 it here  
  
[raccoon] iconic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave feedback please !  
> i hope u enjoyed :) <3


	3. uwus and emoticons

**5:13AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[stanley] I hate the way Bill types  
  
[mike] so it's fair game! uwu  
  
[trash] WHAFSTDGWAHHAH  
  
[trash] WHAT  
  
[trash] WMIKE?? JUST???????? UWU'd????????????????????  
  
[mike] ..?  
  
[mike] i always uwu  
  
[trash] SINECE WHJEJN???????  
  
[mike] forever??? ovo  
  
[trash] that looks like a bird  
  
[stanley] It looks like an owl :)  
  
[trash] WHAT IS GOING ON?????????   
  
[trash] STAN JUST USED AN EMOTICON>"<>><M>UOYUPOWQ>?  
  
[beverly] STAN DID WHAT?????????/  
  
[stanley] Jesus Christ  
  
[beverly] AWWWW STANNY USED AN EMOTICON  
  
[trash] its so much cuter when it comes from stan  
  
[mike] that shouldnt make sense but it does  
  
[stanley] What?? Mike, you too??  
  
[mike] sorry stan cant deny the truth  
  
[raccoon] omg stan did a :)  
  
[xXg4m3rb0i42069Xx] w8 th@s so cute  
  
[stanley] Ugh not gamer boy too  
  
[xXg4m3rb0i42069Xx] ykw  
  
  
 _xXg4m3rb0i42069Xx changed their name to "bill"_  
  
  
[bill] u guys suck  
  
[trash] >:(  
  
  
 _trash changed bill's name to "trash collector"_  
  
  
[ben] bichie :D  
  
[ben] wait what was all the fuss about?  
  
[trash] mike did a uwu, stan used a :)  
  
[trash] the world must be ending


	4. straight a's

**12:07PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[trash collector] how is richie so stupid yet so smart  
  
[stanley] How is Richie smart?  
  
[trash] i've had straight a's since third grade u know this stanny  
  
[trash] that's probably the only straight thing about me  
  
[trash] wait  
  
[trash] no  
  
[stanley] Rich?  
  
[trash collector] did richie just come out??????????  
  
[beverly] omg  
  
[raccoon] I KNEW IT!! I FUCKING KNEW IT  
  
[mike] im so proud!!!!!!! uwuwuwuwuwuwu  
  
[ben] omg thats great richie!!!  
  
[trash] wait.. you guys dont hate me?  
  
[trash collector] no?? we dont really have a reason XD  
  
[beverly] we're all supportive rich!!  
  
[raccoon] yeah we love u still even though ur annoying  
  
[trash collector] ofc!!! it was kinda obvious though........  
  
[trash] wow thanks guys :')  
  
[ben] stan we're waiting on ur approval...  
  
[stanley] Well...  
  
[trash] oh god oh fuck  
  
[stanley] I already hated Richie, so...  
  
[trash] whatajsdkfbdscie  
  
[stanley] Kidding, I'm supportive as well  
  
[trash] oh thank fuck  
  
[mike] yay!!!!!!  
  
[trash collector] :red heart::orange heart::yellow heart::green heart::blue heart::purple heart:  
  
[ben] :party emojis lol im too lazy just imagine a string of party emojis:  
  
[beverly] GAY RICHIE RIGHTS!!!!!!  
  
[raccoon] GAY RICHEIE IRGHTS!!  
  
[stanley] Gay Richie rights :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gay richie rights!! :D


	5. banker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> stan takes it a lil too far and richie blows up  
> losers gotta have hard times too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dont be too upset bc things get better very quickly :D  
> plus im leaving it on a tiny cliffhanger bc i wont update for a day or two ;)

**4:56PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[mike] guys  
  
[mike] bill is going to be offline for a few hours  
  
[trash] when will he be back  
  
[mike] idk he said around 8  
  
[trash] can we trashtalk about him  
  
[mike] no-  
  
[beverly] im in  
  
[raccoon] me too  
  
[stanley] Why not  
  
[mike] oh jeez  
  
[raccoon] he's such a fuckboy  
  
[beverly] OMG UR RIGHT  
  
[stanley] Yet types like a 12 year old gamer in the early 2000s  
  
[trash collector] 1st of all: fuck u guys  
  
[trash] NO UR BACK ALR WTF  
  
[trash collector] also IM NOT A FUCKBOY  
  
[raccoon] sounds like something a fuckboy would say  
  
[trash collector] what the fuckaroni  
  
[beverly] PAHHAHSHSGJDASJDHGSKAHFLDJF  
  
[trash] WHAT THEGD IHGSAUIIALDJKHFSGUDHA  
  
[Stanley] Dear Christ  
  
[raccoon] god how are u 100% lame  
  
[mike] stop being mean to bill :(  
  
[trash collector] yeah stop being mean to me  
  
[trash collector] thanks mike  
  
[mike] :)  
  
  
 _trash changed mike's name to "banker"_  
  
  
[banker] why  
  
[trash] bc u protect the bills ;D  
  
[trash] geddit bc ur protecting bill  
  
[stanley] This is why Richie is my best friend  
  
[stanley] Isn't he so hilarious?  
  
[trash] r u done being sarcastic  
  
[stanley] Yes  
  
[trash] wait really????  
  
[stanley] Yeah  
  
[stanley] Totally  
  
[stanley] Completely  
  
[stanley] Done for good  
  
[trash] OH MY GOD WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN TO ME  
  
[trash] IDK WHAT U WANT FROM ME  
  
[trash] i roast u and u hate it, im nice to u and u hate it  
  
[trash] what if i just die  
  
[stanley] Don't say that  
  
[trash] OH SO U HATE THAT TOO  
  
[beverly] kids, kids, break it up  
  
[trash] sorry  
  
[trash] i gtg  
  
[raccoon] rich..  
  
[trash] im fine lol my dad is yelling at me to clean my room  
  
[beverly] ... :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yabba dabba do


	6. {healthy dose of stozier}

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> helo again :)

**5:17PM**  
 **bert - ernie**  
  
  
[bert] I'm sorry Richie  
  
[ernie] yeah i know  
  
[bert] You know I love you, right?  
  
[ernie] love you too :')  
  
[ernie] ok i seriously have to go my mom is getting upset too  
  
[bert] Oh. I thought you were saying that to leave the texts...  
  
[ernie] no i sERIOUSLY HAVE TO GO OKAY BYE STANNY LOVE YUOU  
  
[bert] Bye Rich lol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan typed out lol and richie didnt freak out???? wow he mustve really left his phone huh
> 
> {richie freaks out later when hes back on his phone but you can picture how that went :)}


	7. rules

**7:07PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[beverly] okay we need some ground rules  
  
[beverly] 1. no intentional hurting someones feelings  
  
[stanley] Damn. What am I supposed to do now  
  
[beverly] 2. no excessive sarcasm  
  
[stanley] Damn. What am I supposed to do now  
  
[beverly] 3. no stealing  
  
[ben] what???  
  
[banker] that had NOTHING to do with the other two  
  
[trash] DAMN WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO NOW  
  
[beverly] 3. there has to be a weekly ship war  
  
[raccoon] WHA  
  
[beverly] what can i say. im a sucker for u guys being in love  
  
[trash collector] we have a personal fangirl  
  
  
 _ben changed beverly's name to "fangirl"_  
  
  
[stanley] You said three twice  
  
[fangirl] 4. there has to be a weekly ship war  
  
[fangirl] 5. u guys cant come to me about whoever ur in love with  
  
[trash] HEY  
  
[raccoon] WTF  
  
[banker] not fair  
  
[trash collector] BUT BEVVVVV  
  
[fangirl] no!! im over it  
  
[fangirl] u guys are annoying  
  
[ben] but  
  
[fangirl] only ben and stan can come to me  
  
[trash] WHAT WHY  
  
[fangirl] ben and i are dating  
  
[raccoon] WHAAAAAAAt  
  
[banker] omg !!!!!!!!!!!!!! uwuuwuwuwuwuuwuwuwuwu  
  
[trash collector] obvious  
  
[ben] :D  
  
[fangirl] stan is stanley james uris i mean can u blame me  
  
[trash] unfortunately valid :pensive:  
  
[fangirl] plus he just. his crush. just. he needs someone to talk to  
  
[stanley] Beverly...  
  
[fangirl] sorry man!!!!! it has to be said bc........ i just. why  
  
[stanley] As if I'm supposed to know  
  
[trash] WHO DOES STANNY LIKE  
  
[banker] hate to say it. but i'm curious as well  
  
[raccoon] .. i wanna know  
  
[fangirl] no i will not tell  
  
[stanley] Thank you  
  
[fangirl] ALSO 6. NO PESTERING BC I'LL EXPOSE ALL OF UR CRUSHES  
  
[ben] go ahead  
  
[trash] haha very funny. THIS IS A SERIOUS MATTER BENJAMIN  
  
[ben] :)  
  
[fangirl] richie likes (redacted) but thats obvious  
  
[trash] BEVRERLTY  
  
[fangirl] WHAT I DIDNT EVEN SAY THE NAME  
  
[fangirl] I LEGIT TYPED REDACTED WHAT DO U WANT  
  
[trash] sstop that w as so scasrhy im shakinn  
  
[trash collector] well now i want to know  
  
[fangirl] bill likes (redacted) which why. how. i dont understand u boys smh  
  
[trash collector] someone else likes that person???  
  
[fangirl] somehow  
  
[trash collector] WHO  
  
[trash collector] WHAT WHO AM I COMPETING WITH  
  
[fangirl] im not allowed to say  
  
[fangirl] mike likes (redacted) which aww they'd be cute :pensive:  
  
[banker] thanks bev  
  
[fangirl] stanley likes (redacted) which i totally understand kinda not really but ngl. otp  
  
[stanley] Ah  
  
[stanley] I have a question  
  
[trash] shoot  
  
[banker] whats up  
  
[stanley] what if i started typing like this?????  
  
[trash] WHAHHASSGAA Dsnjsd  
  
[banker] highly enjoyable  
  
[trash collector] plz type like that  
  
[fangirl] STANNAY OMFOMSOGM  
  
[raccoon] maybe the world IS ending  
  
[stanley] I'm not going to. That was revolting  
  
[trash] WHAAAAAAA sTANNY :(((((((((((  
  
[fangirl] i knew it was too good to be true :pensive:  
  
[trash] ur such a tease  
  
[stanley] It is my specialty  
  
[fangirl] 7. NO UNNECSSARY TEASING >:(

[stanley] Damn. What am I supposed to do now  
  
[stanley] Also, unnecessary*  
  
[fangirl] I KNOW THAT  
  
[stanley] :-)  
  
[trash] man stan i was just about to propose :pensive: i dont fuck with people who add noses to their emoticons  
  
[stanley] Fuck you  
  
  
 _trash changed stanley's name to "an unfortunate tease"_  
  
  
[trash] HEHEHEHEHEHE LOVVEP YOUUUUUUU  
  
[an unfortunate tease] I am so close to leaving this group chat  
  
[banker] no please dont  
  
[raccoon] stan we need u here  
  
[trash collector] ur the only sane one  
  
  
 _fangirl changed an unfortunate tease's name to "the best"_  
  
  
[the best] Stop sucking up you suck-ups  
  
[trash] but we love you stan :(  
  
[the best] 8. No Sucking Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if i have not made it clear by this whole fic and the one shot i posted: i love stozier  
> but hm....... will it be endgame?


	8. where's my juul?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like its been ages since i posted

**12:37AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[trash] omg  
  
[trash] guys  
  
[trash] GUYS  
  
[fangirl] yes?  
  
[banker] whats up rich  
  
[raccoon] what do u want  
  
[trash] WHEERES MY JUUL  
  
[trash collector] oh my god  
  
[trash] ABSDFW wEHREESD MY JUUL  
  
[the best] You own a Juul?  
  
[ben] ??? what is going on  
  
[trash] I LIKE LITERALLY JUST HAD IT IN MY HAND  
  
[raccoon] ohh  
  
[trash] HAVE YOU SEEN IT????? WHERE IS IT?????????????//  
  
[ben] guys whats happening  
  
[trash] WHERSEs MY JUUL  
  
[trash] SO NOT COOL  
  
[fangirl] WHERES MY JUUL  
  
[trash] LMFAOOSHGHDAJKL  
  
[trash] WHERES MY JUUL  
  
[banker] ben im confused too  
  
[ben] im scared  
  
[trash collector] I swear to God, bitch, if you stole my fucking JUUL  
I will break each and every one of your goddamn fucking fingers  
And if I find that shit  
Aha, I will fucking ram that shit so far down your throat  
You're gonna be fucking coughing up clouds for the next month  
You goddamn useless little bitch  
Fucking help me find my fucking JUUL  
  
[trash] PE<LASBYDU WHAETRES MY JUUUUULLLLLL  
  
[raccoon] its a song  
  
[ben] why  
  
[the best] Oh. Okay, good  
  
[the best] I thought you were actually ruining your lungs more than you already do  
  
[trash] AWWWWWWWWWWWWW STANNY CARES ABOUT MEEEE  
  
[the best] Obviously, dipshit  
  
[trash collector] richie and i were talking about that song earlier  
  
[fangirl] ah okay  
  
[raccoon] quick check up: did everyone do their homework?  
  
[the best] As always  
  
[ben] yes i did  
  
[banker] i actually did tonight  
  
[fangirl] for the first time in forever  
  
[trash] some of it  
  
[raccoon] RICHIE!!!! u need to do ur homework :(  
  
[trash] ehh its fine i'll do it later  
  
[the best] its approaching one am  
  
[fangirl] ?????????? STAN UR TYPING?????????????????/  
  
[banker] WHY IS IT LOWERCASE?  
  
[the best] ugh dont make a big deal out of it  
  
[trash] but but but butb utbut butbtbu tbutb utbtub but  
  
[the best] Moment's over  
  
[fangirl] noooooooooooooo :(((((((((((((((((((((


	9. question

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short lil baby stozier :D

**2:23AM**  
 **bert - ernie**  
  
  
[ernie] hey quick question\\\  
  
[ernie] does ur mom like me  
  
[bert] It's two in the morning  
  
[ernie] ........yeah but does she  
  
[bert] Richie, we've been friends since we were children. You came to my bar mitzvah   
  
[bert] I think it's safe to say she likes you  
  
[ernie] okay cool  
  
[ernie] night stanny  
  
[bert] Goodnight Richie


	10. undying love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> last one for today  
> ....
> 
> kinda sad   
> if yk yk

**5:10AM**  
 **bert - ernie**  
  
  
[bert] Hey  
  
[ernie] whats up stannio  
  
[bert] Oh. You're awake  
  
[ernie] yessir i am. couldnt sleep  
  
[bert] Are you okay?  
  
[ernie] awww you do care about me :pleading::point right::point left:  
  
[bert] Yessir I do  
  
[ernie] are YOU okay? ur not being sarcastic or anything...  
  
[bert] Well I wanted to tell you something  
  
[ernie] you can tell me anything stangelica  
  
[bert] Forget it now, it was supposed to be you would see it hours later  
  
[ernie] lol what?? were u gonna confess ur undying love for me???  
  
[bert] No  
  
[bert] Of course not  
  
[bert] That's kind of self centered of you to think I would even have a crush on you  
  
[ernie] jeez stannabelle i was kidding  
  
[ernie] dont get ur panties in a knot  
  
[ernie] its not like i like you or anything  
  
[bert] Oh  
  
[bert] Who do you like?  
  
[ernie] okay uh.. dont tell anyone  
  
[bert] I promise I won't  
  
[ernie] okay um.. i kinda developed feelings for eddie  
  
[bert] Eddie? Like our Eddie. "Edward Spaghedward." That Eddie?  
  
[ernie] KGHSJK yes stan THAT eddie  
  
[bert] Oh. Okay. Cool  
  
[ernie] r u okay?? u seem put off by that..... is it bc its a boy??  
  
[bert] No!! No, I'm totally okay with you liking boys haha  
  
[bert] I'm just... tired I guess.  
  
[bert] I'll talk to you later  
  
[ernie] what are acronyms even for  
  
[ernie] see u later stanny


	11. forever and opposites

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sometimes to boost my ego i like to think that i encouraged the boom in losers gc fics when in reality i know its just bc we're all quarantined

**5:23AM**  
**leslie - ron**

  
  
[ron] Beverly oh my God  
  
[ron] He likes Eddie..  
  
[ron] Of course he does  
  
[leslie] what???//  
  
[leslie] oh... richie?  
  
[ron] Yes, Richie  
  
[ron] Remind me to never attempt confessing my feelings for someone  
  
[leslie] im sorry stanny :(  
  
[ron] no its fine hahah  
  
[ron] i shouldve known.. theyve been friends for forever and theyre complete opposites it works  
  
[leslie] ... you guys have been friends for forever and are complete opposites  
  
[ron] oh so its just me  
  
[leslie] stan dont say that :((  
  
[ron] its true isnt it  
  
[leslie] no..  
  
[leslie] look if it helps at all: eddie doesnt like richie  
  
[ron] WHAT WHY NOT???  
  
[leslie] I DONT KNOW?????  
  
[leslie] look i have to go  
  
[leslie] i'll ttyl  
  
[ron] yeah i'll be in bed doing nothing  
  
[leslie] stan...  
  
[ron] come over if u want

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woOAah stan typing lowercase???  
> its bc hes sad :(


	12. he's fine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had planned my notes for these and i completely forgot :((  
> i'm also doing these bc i like them and they're fun  
> plus the next few chapters are stozier-centered and i did not mean for this fic to go in that direction but welp  
> AND the next few chapters are kinda sad

**5:23AM**   
**lilo - stitch**

  
  
[stitch] bev... the weirdest thing just happened?  
  
[lilo] hit me  
  
[stitch] stan was about to text me something but like freaked out when i texted back  
  
[lilo] oh  
  
[lilo] that is weird lol  
  
[stitch] is he okay????  
  
[lilo] how should i know?????  
  
[stitch] he said he was going to sleep and i feel bad :(  
  
[lilo] why?  
  
[stitch] idk.. he texted multiple times in a row and he only does that when he's panicking or on the verge of anxiety attack  
  
[stitch] oh god did i give him an anxiety attack  
  
[lilo] im sure he's fine  
  
[lilo] get some rest maybe  
  
[stitch] yeah okay ttyl  
  
[lilo] ttyl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh my god? i live for one-sided ships even though they make me sad  
> but hey!!  
> you get to know who eddie likes next chapter :))


	13. oh god

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dont be too mad at me :(

**12:21PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[trash] can u guys convince bev to tell me something??  
  
[fangirl] NO  
  
[trash collector] what is it  
  
[trash] i wanna know who stanny likes  
  
[the best] Do not tell him  
  
[raccoon] TELL HIM bc he'll tell me  
  
[the best] DO NOT TELL HIM  
  
[trash] cmon stan... its me... ur best bud since birth  
  
[the best] So?  
  
[trash] sooooo i told you mine, u have to do the same.  
  
[the best] That's not how it works...  
  
[raccoon] wait... who does richie like??  
  
[trash collector] YEAH WHO DOES RICH LIKE  
  
[trash] well... u see... the funny thing is.............  
  
[the best] See how it feels Turdball??  
  
[raccoon] turdball  
  
[fangirl] turd  
  
[trash collector] ball  
  
[trash] thats new  
  
[the best] Ugh I hate it here  
  
  
 _the best has left the groupchat!_  
  
 _trash added stanley to the groupchat!_  
  
  
[trash] dont leave :(  
  
[stanley] Don't annoy me  
  
[stanley] Oh wait. That's not possible :(  
  
[trash] that's mean :(  
  
[stanley] ... I'm sorry  
  
  
 _stanley changed their name to "Richie's Man"_  
  
  
[trash] OMG U ACTUALLY DID IT  
  
  
 _trash changed their name to "stanley's man"_  
  
 _richie's man changed stanley's man's name to "stanley's boy"_  
  
  
[stanley's boy] I'LL TAKE WHAT I CAN GET  
  
[raccoon] so they like each other  
  
[trash collector] figures  
  
[fangirl] they dont like each other actually  
  
[stanley's boy] awwww my hoes are mad  
  
[stanley's boy] HOES MAD HOES MAD HOES MAD  
  
[raccoon] i am NOT ur hoe  
  
[stanley's boy] in all seriousness, stan and i are just best friends .. i dont think im capable of liking stanley lol  
  
[richie's man] oh  
  
[stanley's boy] plus i have my heart set on another   
  
[fangirl] u just friendzoned stan :(  
  
[richie's man] oh  
  
[stanley's boy] pfft as if stanny would ever like me  
  
[richie's man] oh god  
  
[stanley's boy] im loud and messy and stan once said his ideal man was rob lowe and i am the exact opposite of rob lowe  
  
[richie's man] dear christ  
  
[raccoon] stan u okay?  
  
[richie's man] uhhh  
  
[fangirl] :(  
  
[fangirl] can i tell them stan?  
  
[richie's man] i think i need to throw up  
  
[richie's man] uh yeah go ahead my dad is calling me anyways just dont expect me to be active for... forever  
  
[trash collector] ??? is he okay  
  
[fangirl] well  
  
[raccoon] what were u gonna tell us bev  
  
[fangirl] stanley DOES like richie...  
  
[stanley's boy] what  
  
[fangirl] his ideal man is more like... bill hader  
  
[stanley's boy] wait  
  
[stanley's boy] wait what  
  
[raccoon] oh god. stan must be heartbroken  
  
[stanley's boy] wait  
  
[trash collector] oh god AND u friendzoned him HARD  
  
[stanley's boy] wait  
  
[stanley's boy] but... he wouldve told me? right???????  
  
[fangirl] stan wouldve never told you and u know that  
  
[stanley's boy] but  
  
[banker] is everything okay? 63 messages???  
  
[raccoon] scroll up...  
  
[stanley's boy] wait  
  
[fangirl] im sorry u found out this way rich  
  
[trash collector] yeah this sux  
  
[raccoon] shut up bill  
  
[banker] oh jeez  
  
[banker] how do u think whoever likes stan feels...  
  
[fangirl] omg i didnt even think of that  
  
[raccoon] he must be feeling... hurt and angry and confused  
  
[trash collector] and heartbroken  
  
[raccoon] cant forget that one  
  
[stanley's boy] someone in this gc likes stan? my stan? stan the man uris. stanley urine. "Type with proper grammar" stan. that stan??  
  
[raccoon] yes, richie. not everything is about you  
  
[stanley's boy] THATS NOT WHAT I WAS SUGGESTING  
  
[trash collector] "my stan?"  
  
[stanley's boy] but... he is my stan...... he......  
  
[stanley's boy] who likes stan?  
  
[banker] isnt me  
  
[trash collector] me neither  
  
[fangirl] not ben nor i  
  
[stanley's boy] whos left??  
  
[stanley's boy] eddie  
  
[raccoon] yeah uh... i like stan  
  
[stanley's boy] oh god

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oppa gangnum style
> 
> any theories on whats gonna happen next?


	14. heart wants what it wants

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tried something new;;

Stanley was heartbroken. Now, he had to face his problems and couldn’t ignore them. The problems were Richie and Stan’s feelings for Richie, which were already hard to ignore. The worst part was that there was no one to blame. Stanley couldn’t get angry at anyone because no one was at fault. He wanted to check on the group chat but was too scared. It made his blood boil. He would always be too scared to do anything. He was too scared to even tell Richie himself.  
  
“How are you feeling, Stan?” Beverly asked, quietly. Stanley looked up from stuffing his face into his pillow to see his red-heads friend. He sat up next to her and hung his head which made Bev pucker her lips. “Eddie said who he liked in the group chat... If you wanna know.” She suggested, bumping their shoulders. Stanley looked up at her through his eyelashes and fallen locks. “He likes you.” Beverly whispered, lacing her fingers. “Me?” Stan furrowed his eyebrows and brushed his curls out of his face. “What? Why? Richie likes him...”  
  
“Heart wants what it wants,” Beverly responded meekly, giving a small shrug. “So we’re in some weird love triangle?” Stanley asked rhetorically, falling back on his bed and groaning into his palms. “This is so screwed.” Beverly laid down next to him, laying on her side and resting her head on the back of her hand. Stanley repeated her actions. “What’s going to happen?” He asked, almost to soft to hear. Beverly shrugged, sending him a solemn smile. “Knowing you, this’ll be worked out in a few days.”   
  
Stanley bit his lip. “But what if I can’t figure this out? Now I’m too scared to talk to either of them.” Beverly pondered for a moment. “Make a group chat. With the three of you, and I guess I’ll be in it too. But this is the last time I’m meddling with your guys’ love life’s.” She finished with a grin. Stan chuckled softly, tucking a curl behind his ear. “Okay, sounds good.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls tell me if u liked this and want more chapters like this!! or if u didnt like it and want me to stick to texting also tell me :)


	15. ur braver than u think

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hullo my friend got confused so i am setting this straight:
> 
> in private dms-
> 
> bert: stan  
> ernie: richie
> 
> lilo: bev  
> stitch: richie
> 
> sam: richie  
> diane: eddie
> 
> leslie: beverly  
> ron: stanley
> 
> that's all i've done so far oops

**10:24AM**  
**bert - ernie**  
  
  
[ernie] stan, we have to talk about this  
  
[ernie] i know how you love avoiding things but this needs to be sorted out :/  
  
  
  
**10:27AM**  
**sam - diane**

  
[sam] hey  
  
[diane] hi, whats up  
  
[sam] i like you  
  
[diane] oh okay  
  
[diane] wait what  
  
[sam] i like you, you like stan, stan likes me  
  
[diane] omg  
  
[sam] we're in a love triangle and need to talk about it but stan's avoiding me  
  
[diane] im not reaching out to him  
  
[sam] wha?? why not?  
  
[diane] i have a crush on him and he knows it?? im too nervous  
  
[sam] u guys are still friends right?? i mean look at us  
  
[diane] i guess... but im sorry rich, im not like u :(( im too scared  
  
[sam] who stood up to their mother to kill a psychotic clown  
  
[diane] ...me  
  
[sam] who killed a psychotic clown just 4 years ago  
  
[diane] also me  
  
[sam] who likes someone 10x their height  
  
[diane] me  
  
[sam] ur braver than u think  
  
[diane] thanks rich...  
  
[diane] im still not doing it  
  
[sam] dammit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan loves me i promise is slmip for short  
> take out the l: smip  
> rearrange the letters: simp  
> in conclusion, all of the losers are simps  
> thank you, goodnight
> 
> it is 11:31AM for me but whatever im signing off for now bye bye
> 
> ALSo:  
> ITS MY SISTER'S BIRTHDAY! COMMENT "happy birthday olivia" OR ELSE UR CANCELLED ;v;


	16. weird love triangle + bev

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whip nae nae

**10:49AM**   
_stanley added richie and two others!_   
_beverly named the chat "weird love triangle + bev"_

  
**10:50AM**   
**weird love triangle + bev**

  
[richie] HI  
  
[stanley] Bev I can't do this  
  
[beverly] too late hun  
  
[eddie] hello?  
  
[stanley] Hi  
  
[eddie] oh uh hi  
  
[richie] hi stanny :)  
  
[stanley] Hello  
  
[beverly] oh my god?? u guys are so awkward LKJHGFSDHJ  
  
[richie] why is bev in here  
  
[stanley] I didn't want to be in a group chat with just my crush and my crush's crush who likes me  
  
[eddie] makes sense  
  
[richie] u called me ur crush :pleading::point right::point left:  
  
[stanley] Well yeah... That's what you are  
  
[eddie] it hurts to be here?  
  
[richie] uh huh tell me about it  
  
[stanley] Yeah us too Eds  
  
[eddie] oh right.  
  
[beverly] anywhoooooo everyone say the name of who you like  
  
[richie] edward  
  
[eddie] ...stanley  
  
[stanley] Richie unfortunately  
  
[richie] hey :(  
  
[beverly] would you all date that person?  
  
[eddie] yes  
  
[stanley] Unfortunately  
  
[richie] definitely  
  
[beverly] yikes. this got us nowhere   
  
[eddie] ?? what did u expect  
  
[beverly] i thought at least one of you would say no..  
  
[beverly] aww u guys really like each other thats cute  
  
[stanley] Beverly...  
  
[beverly] sorry, last question. are u guys open to a polyamorous relationship?  
  
[richie] sure  
  
[eddie] if the other two are up for it  
  
[stanley] I don't know...  
  
[stanley] Richie, I thought you said you weren't capable of liking me...  
  
[richie] .... it was a small white fib  
  
[stanley] Why would you say that?!  
  
[richie] i didnt know u liked me!!!!! i didnt want to make u uncomfortable :(  
  
[eddie] what do u mean by fib? how small of a lie was it?  
  
[richie] i mean... ive thought about taking him out to dates and holding his hand and kissing him... but i just assumed he didnt like me so i pushed all of it aside;; plus thats when i was denying i was gay  
  
[beverly] OMG stan was a part of ur gay awakening  
  
[richie] stan WAS my gay awakening,, after i knew that i was gay i started liking eddie  
  
[stanley] WHAT? HE GETS ALL THE CREDIT FOR MY WORK??  
  
[stanley] Also, that's really cute, Richie :(  
  
[richie] ur really cute stan :(  
  
[eddie] uh hello im still here  
  
[richie] UR REALLY CUTE TOO EDS  
  
[beverly] eddie, have u ever thought about dating richie? stan, have u ever thought about dating eddie?  
  
[eddie] ive thought about kissing rich....  
  
[stanley] I've thought about taking Eddie on dates..  
  
[beverly] so you all like each other.. poly??  
  
[stanley] Polyamorous relationships aren't just about kissing and dates. They should be full of genuine love...  
  
[richie] i genuinely love the both of you  
  
[beverly] richie... we all know u have so much love to give,, but u dont really manage it wisely  
  
[beverly] and we're all only 16  
  
[stanley] I'm fifteen...  
  
[beverly] AND stanley's the baby of the group  
  
[stanley] Beverly...  
  
[beverly] just facts stanny  
  
[richie] but i do love both of you. it doesnt feel right with anyone else  
  
[beverly] AGGGGHhhhh bill likes you  
  
[eddie] WHAT  
  
[stanley] Oh my God  
  
[richie] BILL TOO???? i really am a babe magnet  
  
[stanley] Ugh, shut up  
  
[eddie] please tell me that mike doesnt like stan or i  
  
[beverly] mike likes bill  
  
[beverly] i am such a bad friend  
  
[richie] i still only have feelings for eds and stanny  
  
[stanley] This has got to be one of the weirdest days of my life  
  
[eddie] ditto  
  
[richie] guys... this is the part where u say u love me too :(  
  
[stanley] Love you too, Rich  
  
[eddie] kdjhfgdskjk love you richie  
  
[beverly] I LOVE YOU GUYS TOO :D  
  
[richie] LOVE U BEV  
  
[eddie] love you too bev!!  
  
[stanley] Love you, Beverly, thank you :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan being a year younger than the rest of the losers is probably my favorite thing... ever


	17. f

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i do not like wyatt's facial hair

**11:27AM**  
**stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[stanley's boy] I HEARD THAT U WERE TALKING SHIT  
  
[raccoon] AND YOU DIDNT THINK THAT I WOULD HEAR IT  
  
[trash collector] hello???  
  
[stanley's boy] hi  
  
[banker] hey guys  
  
[richie's man] Will you guys SHUT UP I'm doing something important on my phone  
  
[stanley's boy] jus go on ur laptop  
  
[richie's man] No. I'm putting the chat on silent  
  
[stanley's boy] NOOOOOOOO STANNYYYYYYYYY  
  
[richie's man] Shut up, I'll be back  
  
[banker] thats my cue to go too  
  
[trash collector] spam f for our fallen soldier  
  
[raccoon] f  
  
[fangirl] f  
  
[ben] f  
  
[stanley's boy] f  
  
[trash collector] richie no u ARE the fallen soldier  
  
[stanley's boy] OH HJDGSJDKDFHSK  
  
[fangirl] these names are so confusing

  
_fangirl changed stanley's boy's name to "trash"_  
  
_fangirl changed richie's man's name to "the best"_

  
[trash] noooooooooo :((((((  
  
[fangirl] oh did u guys know that stan is growing facial hair  
  
[raccoon] he what  
  
[fangirl] yeah i saw him the other day and there's some stubble  
  
[trash] pics or it didnt happen  
  
[fangirl] {the picture that wyatt just posted except at a better angle HAHA}  
  
[raccoon] WHAHAWAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW  
  
[trash collector] u broke eddie  
  
[banker] i can confirm we were just facetiming  
  
[the best] I've been betrayed  
  
[raccoon] STNALEY WHAT UR A BABY HOW  
  
[the best] I'm not even that much younger than you guys  
  
[fangirl] OMG STAN IS BABY AND A BABY  
  
[the best] My own best friend...  
  
[trash collector] SSAKPAM SPMA F FOR OUR FALLEN SOLDIER  
  
[trash collector] F  
  
[raccoon] F  
  
[banker] F  
  
[ben] F  
  
[trash] F  
  
[fangirl] HAHAGHSAHGAHSGHHADHKD  
  
[the best] If I leave you'll just add me back right  
  
[trash] yes  
  
[the best] Damn  
  
  
_trash changed their name to "HOES MAD"_  
  
  
[hoes mad] haha  
  
[hoes mad] WTF WHY IS IT LOWERCASE  
  
[the best] Hoes mad  
  
[fangirl] DAAAAAAAAMNGDJSKHDGDS  
  
[raccoon] stan got u good  
  
[trash collector] get rekt XD  
  
[raccoon] EUGH STO  
  
[hoes mad] sto :heart eyes:  
  
[raccon] stfu  
  
[hoes mad] <\--  
  
[raccoon] WHS AHSDJKSDFHNKSJDA  
  
[the best] Anyways, Vincent is getting so big :-(  
  
[banker] hes getting big and strong!! uwu  
  
[hoes mad] i still cant get over that mike uwus  
  
[hoes mad] WAIT OMG THE NAME OF THE GC  
  
[raccoon] "stan loves me i promise" ??  
  
[hoes mad] YES!!!! STAN REALLY DOES LOVE ME  
  
  
_the best changed the group chat name from "stan loves me i promise" to "Fuck you Richie"_  
  
  
**11:56AM**  
**fuck you richie**  
  
[hoes mad] i dont like the name of the gc

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk if this ruins the magic or anything but i do not have these written out LFMMAOFMDIF i have an idea of what i want and then i write it and then i post it kjhgfdsfgh whenever i post three in a row its legit bc i just wrote three chapters in one sitting


	18. georgie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can u believe this whole fic has been over a span of four days?? wild

**3:11PM**  
 **fuck you richie**  
  
  
[trash collector] guys georgie wants to be added to the gc  
  
[trash collector] tell him no  
  
[the best] Georgie can join if he wants to  
  
  
 _banker changed the group chat name from "fuck you richie" to "stan loves me i promise"_  
  
  
 **3:13PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[banker] now he can  
  
[trash collector] no you guys are supposed to say no  
  
[hoes mad] why i want georgie here  
  
  
 _banker changed hoes mad's name to "trash"_  
  
  
[fangirl] mike is babyproofing the gc and its the sweetest thing ever  
  
[banker] i dont want him to be corrupted :(  
  
[ben] let georgie join :)  
  
[fangirl] ^^  
  
[raccoon] georgie is the best so yes let him  
  
[trash collector] or i could just tell him u guys said no  
  
[trash] :(  
  
[trash collector] fiiiiiiiine  
  
  
 _trash collector added georgie to the group chat!_  
  
  
[georgie] hello?  
  
[trash] GEORGIE!!!!  
  
[fangirl] hi georgie!!!!  
  
[banker] hey bud!!  
  
[georgie] hi..?  
  
[banker] oh- im mike, trash is richie, fangirl is beverly, the best is stanley, ben is ben, raccoon is eddie, and trash collector is ur brother  
  
[georgie] oh!! hi!!!  
  
[fangirl] he's so cute pls  
  
[the best] Hi Georgie  
  
[georgie] hi stanley c:  
  
[georgie] my mom is calling me i'll be right back!!  
  
[trash collector] OH GUYS GEORGIE HAS THE BIGGEST CRUSH ON STANLEY  
  
[raccoon] oh dear i have some competition  
  
[fangirl] KJAHGFDHSJ ISNT GEORGIE LIKE 10  
  
[trash collector] yES xD  
  
[the best] Aww that's so cute  
  
[trash collector] he likes you bc ur "pretty" and he likes ur hair and ur the closest to his age  
  
[the best] It has nothing to do with my personality or that we spent the majority of our lives together?  
  
[trash collector] that too  
  
[trash] stan r u gonna choose a 10 yr old over eddie and i  
  
[the best] Maybe  
  
[raccoon] WTF  
  
[georgie] hi guys!  
  
[the best] Hey Georgie :)  
  
[raccoon] georgie dont trust stan hes mean and a player  
  
[georgie] no he's not :(  
  
[the best] No, I'm not  
  
[trash] YES HE IS he likes both eddie and i  
  
[georgie] what? :(  
  
[the best] Georgie, don't listen to them. They're being stupid  
  
[georgie] okay i trust u  
  
[trash collector] this is funny  
  
[fangirl] shut up bill its cute  
  
[georgie] what is?  
  
[fangirl] you! *boop*  
  
[georgie] did u just boop me?  
  
[fangirl] yep!  
  
[georgie] boop! now i booped you!  
  
[fangirl] yay!  
  
[banker] uwu georgie is babey  
  
[georgie] thank you :D  
  
[trash collector] hey georgie  
  
[trash collector] i told them about ur crush  
  
[georgie] ?  
  
[georgie] WHY  
  
[trash collector] bc he deserves to know  
  
[the best] Don't worry Georgie! I think it's cute  
  
[georgie] you do..?  
  
[the best] Yeah! A lot of idiots have crushes on me and you're the only one who isn't an idiot :)  
  
[raccoon] HEY  
  
[trash] WTF DUDE  
  
[the best] Just facts, guys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ☃  
> im writing a seven part literate fic and oh my god?? ive been working on it for months and the first chapter isnt even done  
> its taking so long bc im a mild perfectionist and it needs to be perfect  
> i stg if it doesnt get any attention i might cry


	19. anxiety

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> v short bc idk how to transition :(

**4:39PM**   
**stan loves me i promise**   
  
  
_trash collector removed georgie from the group chat!_

  
[fangirl] hello???????? why??????????????????  
  
[trash collector] my mom told me to, she doesn't want georgie to be surrounded by us bc we're older  
  
[banker] awh :( spam f for our fallen soldier  
  
[fangirl] f  
  
[banker] f  
  
[trash collector] where is everyone?  
  
[ben] f hi sorry  
  
[trash] f  
  
[trash] stan and eddie are hanging out   
  
[fangirl] how do u know?  
  
[trash] they walked past the arcade  
  
[ben] i have to tell you guys something  
  
[trash] whats up benji  
  
[ben] i was diagnosed with anxiety  
  
[trash collector] oh man :( im sorry ben :(  
  
[trash] me too :((  
  
[banker] hey if u need someone to talk to im here for u  
  
[ben] thank you, but its fine  
  
[ben] i just wanted to explain why im not very active in the gc.. im just better one on one or in smaller groups  
  
[trash] thats okay ben!! you dont have to talk in the gc if i makes you anxious :)  
  
[ben] thanks guys <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my poor baby boy ;n;


	20. rash remedies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello the superpower chapters are gone lets forget that. ever happened
> 
> i will try to be more active i am so sorry!! :(

**12:54AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[trash] this gc DIED  
  
[raccoon] we havent been active for one (1) day  
  
[banker] and thats bc we were all together irl  
  
[fangirl] i just left ur house??? like two minutes ago???????  
  
[trash] yeh but it still died  
  
  
 _the best changed trash's name to "rash"_  
  
  
[rash] why  
  
[the best] You're bothersome and it still looks like "trash"  
  
[fangirl] good one  
  
[rash] as long as i get to be on you  
  
[raccoon] bad one  
  
[rash] your dick  
  
[trash collector] worst one  
  
[rash] no love in this gc  
  
[the best] Sucks to suck  
  
[rash] i hate it here i wanna go home :(((  
  
[rash] OHMG WAIt  
  
  
 _rash changed trash collector's name to "cerave"_  
  
 _rash changed raccoon's name to "aquaphor"_  
  
  
[the best] ?  
  
[fangirl] RASH REMEDIES JKHSJGAHDS  
  
[cerave] jesus fucking christ  
  
[aquaphor] can u believe this is the same richie who professed his love for me  
  
[the best] Brag much?  
  
[aquaphor] STFU LET ME LIVE  
  
[banker] i never realized how sensitive all of u are;;;  
  
[rash] ykw mike  
  
[banker] richie do not try anything your user right now is "rash" and anything u say to me will only make me laugh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope this made u laugh  
> even just a small chuckle  
> or ykw that nose exhale thing that. thats good too


	21. big bill and ten inch tozier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ken: bill  
> barbie: beverly
> 
> shaggy: bill  
> scooby: richie

**2:11AM**  
 **barbie - ken**  
  
  
[ken] bev i really wanna tell him  
  
[barbie] hun... u alr know that he likes eddie.. so u know he wont reciprocate  
  
[ken] yeah... but i alr know what will happen so... no harm?? right???  
  
[barbie] do what you want denbrough  
  
  
  
 **2:16AM**  
 **shaggy - scooby**  
  
  
[shaggy] hey tozier  
  
[scooby] yessir :pleading:  
  
[shaggy] ew whyd u do that  
  
[scooby] u never pm me im happy  
  
[shaggy] oh. well. i just wanted to say that ive had the biggest crush on u since i stopped liking bev  
  
[shaggy] so.. seventh grade  
  
[shaggy] and i know u like eddie so plz dont bring that up  
  
[scooby] YOWZA BILL  
  
[scooby] that means so much  
  
[scooby] man can u imagine the sex we'd have  
  
[shaggy] ???????????? WHAT????????????????  
  
[scooby] BC OF OUR NICK NAMES .. BIG BILL AND TEN INCH TOZIER  
  
[shaggy] god rich u r such a horndog  
  
[scooby] am not i jsyt think about sex a lot bc its lik th only thng i jok abo  
  
[scooby] okay i stopped typing bc i read it  
  
[scooby] its too bad im having too much sex with ur mother :0 :( ;)  
  
[shaggy] goodnight richie   
  
[scooby] GNIGHT BILLY :DDDD LOVE YOUUUUUU  
  
[shaggy] love u too


	22. michael hanlon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> star: beverly  
> marco: eddie

**3:50AM**   
**star - marco**

  
[marco] BEVERLY OH MY GOD IM THE WORST  
  
[star] no ur not whats up  
  
[marco] wHY do my crushes come and go like waves  
  
[star] oh god who is it now  
  
[marco] ..........michael hanlon  
  
[star] aww thats actually cute  
  
[marco] BEV!!! NOT GOOD!!!!!!!! how am i supposed to tell stan and richie :(  
  
[star] jsut... tell them................ go to the love triangle gc and change the name or something idk  
  
[marco] hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im a sucker for kasplon


	23. stozier + eddie & bev

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry to all my streddie fighters

**4:00AM**  
 **weird love triangle + bev**  
  
  
 _eddie changed the group chat name from "weird love triangle + bev" to "stozier + eddie & bev"_  
  
  
 **4:01AM**  
 **stozier + eddie & bev**  
  
  
[richie] ?  
  
[eddie] uhhhhhhhhhhh  
  
[beverly] eddie doesnt like u two anymore :(  
  
[richie] oh  
  
[stanley] Oh?  
  
[beverly] his heart belongs to mikey now  
  
[eddie] BEVRELYYRE SHUT UP  
  
[stanley] Oh  
  
[richie] oh  
  
[eddie] pqrstuvwxyz  
  
[eddie] haha get it  
  
[stanley] I don't know how to respond  
  
[eddie] its the alphabet bc u guys said o so i kept it going  
  
[stanley] No, not that. I understood that. I don't know how to respond to you liking Mike  
  
[eddie] oh  
  
[richie] pqrstuvwxyz  
  
[eddie] :D  
  



	24. confession but thats not the right word

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, so sorry about this ff slowing down.. im posting a new fic ive been working really hard on soon {on sunday} and after i post that i will try to get this one going again!! thank u for ur patience :)

**2:45PM**  
**stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[the best] Good afternoon  
  
[fangirl] hey stanny!!  
  
[banker] hello :)  
  
[cerave] whats up fuckers  
  
[aquaphor] hi everyone  
  
[the best] How is everyone?  
  
[fangirl] pretty good!! ben and i are together :)  
  
[banker] thats fun uwu  
  
[cerave] wheres richie? he hasnt been active all day  
  
[rash] my ears are ringing  
  
[cerave] oh hi  
  
[the best] Oh okay. Everyone's here. I have a confession  
  
[banker] whats up stan  
  
[the best] Okay maybe confession isn't the right word...  
  
[fangirl] stanny you can tell us  
  
[the best] Okay  
  
[the best] Okay I can do this  
  
[rash] jeez stan spit it out already  
  
[the best] My preferred pronouns are they/them. I'm fine with you guys still calling me Stanley and Richie, you can still call me your various nicknames, no matter the gender. But I'm nonbinary.  
  
[aquaphor] oh. thats it?  
  
[the best] What do you mean "thats it." I just confessed something I haven't had the balls to say for like... Two years.  
  
[fangirl] im sure he means it differently than ur thinking  
  
[aquaphor] yeah i just mean... i thought it would be weird  
  
[the best] This... Isn't weird to you guys?  
  
[banker] not at all  
  
[rash] yeah we're all gay what did u expect  
  
[the best] Oh Christ, I thought I'd be hated  
  
[cerave] stan we could never hate you  
  
[the best] Thank you guys so much  
  
[fangirl] have u told ur mom and dad?  
  
[the best] No, they weren't too happy about me being bi, so I can't imagine how they would react to this  
  
[banker] just do whatever ur comfortable with bud :)  
  
[the best] Thanks Mike. Thank you all  
  
[the best] This made me feel so much better :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan is enby!! :D this is my favorite hc and will be for forever


	25. love square

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> d-do links work on here..?
> 
> check out my carrd :0  
> https://wyiluna.carrd.co/

**5:09PM**  
**leslie - ron**

[leslie] STAN OMG  
  
[ron] Yes, Beverly?  
  
[leslie] OKAY IM Tel:+LING U THIS BC I TRust YOYu  
  
[ron] Okay...  
  
[leslie] THEERES A LOVE SQUARE  
  
[ron] What does that even mean?  
  
[leslie] mike likes bill, bill likes richie, richie likes eddie, eddie likes mike  
  
[ron] Christ...  
  
[ron] Could this group get any more gay?  
  
[leslie] KAHSkSASJDSADHGDJH  
  
[leslie] what should we do??  
  
[ron] Let them figure it out on their own  
  
[ron] I'm sure they're all oblivious to being in a love square  
  
[leslie] thats true...... but..........  
  
[ron] Didn't you say you wanted to stay out of our love lives?  
  
[leslie] YEAH but its fun :/  
  
[ron] You are so odd.  
  
[leslie] I LOVE YOU TOO!!!! :D  
  
[ron] :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> stan & bev's friendship is my favorite :pensive:  
> curly hair and daddy issues :flushed:


	26. no takebacks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey hi hi hey it would be greatly appreciated if u checked out my new work {its called adore you} BUT YOU DONT HAVE TO it would just be the coolest thing ever if u did okay bye love u 00

**6:38PM**  
**bert - ernie**  
  
  
[ernie] i really like you  
  
[bert] Hello to you too  
  
[ernie] hi stan, i really like you  
  
[bert] Hi Rich, I really like you, I thought you liked Eddie  
  
[ernie] i thought i liked eds too  
  
[bert] ?  
  
[ernie] i was going over old texts and... YOU were my gay awakening... eddie did take all the credit for ur hard work  
  
[bert] Well, I am always right  
  
[ernie] i know that  
  
[ernie] i just  
  
[ernie] ugh why is this so difficult  
  
[ernie] im so sweaty wtf  
  
[bert] Richie?  
  
[ernie] right sorry  
  
[ernie] uhhh do you wanna go to the movies sometime?  
  
[bert] Are you... asking me on a date?  
  
[ernie] yeah  
  
[ernie] yes  
  
[ernie] will you go on a date with me?  
  
[bert] Yes, I will go on a date with you  
  
[ernie] WAIT REALLY oh my god??????? i was expecting you to say no;;;;;  
  
[bert] Why would I say no?  
  
[ernie] idk ur parents or something  
  
[bert] My parents aren't homophobic, and we've had this discussion. My mom likes you  
  
[ernie] yeah but does ur dad???  
  
[bert] Yes Richie, my dad likes you too  
  
[ernie] what a relief he scares me  
  
[bert] I know, you tell me every time you're at my house  
  
[ernie] oh god i hope i didnt make things awkward between us  
  
[bert] What? I said yes, we're going on a date...  
  
[ernie] yeah but what if u dont want me to hang out at ur house anymore  
  
[bert] Impossible and quite the opposite  
  
[bert] I want to hang out more now  
  
[ernie] stan u cant see it but im so close to crying  
  
[bert] You big baby. Remind me to give you a hug next time we see each other  
  
[ernie] NO TAKEBACKS!!!!!!!!!  
  
[ernie] i just screenshotted so u cant take it back  
  
[bert] I wasn't going to take it back  
  
[ernie] good bc i alr said no takebacks  
  
[bert] What? No, I wasn't going to take it back in the first place  
  
[bert] You know what, never mind, let's drop it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my babies are finally doing something about their pining uwu im so proud


	27. canidressyouforthedate

**6:52PM**  
 **ron - leslie**  
  
  
[ron] BEV  
  
[leslie] AH YES  
  
[ron] HE DID IT FINALLY  
  
[leslie] pause  
  
[leslie] rewind  
  
[leslie] who did what  
  
[ron] Richie! Richie asked me out  
  
[leslie] OHMYDOG!!!!!!!! STAJNENY THATDS AMAZING YAYYAYAYYAYA  
  
[ron] omhyshdhsgjs I'm so excited  
  
[leslie] i think thats the first time ive ever seen u keyboard smash  
  
[leslie] im so proud  
  
[ron] BEVERLY I need you to help me  
  
[leslie] yeah anything whats up  
  
[ron] Can you dress me for the date?  
  
[leslie] canidressyouforthedate STANLEY what kind of question is THAT   
  
[leslie] you shouldve been knew that i am dressing you for the date  
  
[ron] Okay, great! Thank you so much  
  
[leslie] anything for you stanny!!! :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wag1


	28. canidressyouforthedate pt2

**6:52PM**  
**lilo - stitch**  
  
  
[stitch] BEV  
  
[leslie] AH YES  
  
[stitch] I DID IT FINALLY  
  
[leslie] did what exactly  
  
[stitch] i asked stan out!!  
  
[leslie] OHMYDOG!!!!!!!! RICHIWE THATDS AMAZING YAYYAYAYYAYA  
  
[stitch] i have a question for you  
  
[leslie] hit me  
  
[stitch] can you dress me for the date?  
  
[leslie] canidressyouforthedate RICHIE what kind of question is THAT  
  
[leslie] you shouldve been knew that i am dressing you for the date  
  
[leslie] btw u and stan are perfect for each other u 2 are TOO in sync its scary

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha homopolar
> 
> cold gay


	29. the greatest man alive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eee too much stozier happening lets get back to funny losers club okay thank u
> 
> \- everyone reading

**8:09PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[rash] GUYS HEOSDLFHEFHS  
  
[rash] OH MY GOD  
  
[cerave] whats up rich  
  
[rash] HEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHHEHE  
  
[fangirl] oh no he sounds like me what happened  
  
[rash] I JUST MET THE GREATEST MAN ALIVE  
  
[banker] who  
  
[the best] Rob Lowe?  
  
[aquaphor] come on stan this is RICHIE he does not think rob lowe is the greatest man alive even though he is  
  
[the best] ...Bill Hader?  
  
[cerave] thats more like it  
  
[rash] NO  
  
[rash] oH MSDYDJSDHJSDSLAK  
  
[rash] I JUST MET GUY FIERI  
  
[fangirl] WHAT HAHAHAHHSAHHAHSDKSJHKSJHDSKSJ  
  
[cerave] i thought it was someone important omg  
  
[banker] rich, really??? smh  
  
[rash] YES I LOVE GUY FIERI ARE U KIDDINDHGSGGSDGD  
  
[rash] HE HUGGED ME PDKSDSKDKSKSDfskjal  
  
[aquaphor] did richie just sksks?????  
  
[banker] did u get a picture?  
  
[rash] YESD   
  
[rash] {picture of richie and guy fieri LMAO}  
  
[fangirl] HOLY SHIT YOU ACTUALLY MET HIM SJHAHSAJSDAHHHAH  
  
[rash] EYYSYEEYSJEYEjs  
  
[rash] today has got to be the greatest day of my life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have a hc that richie met hella famous people   
> but everyone he meets are like memes of some sort  
> like mike myers bc he's shrek  
> but its by coincidence   
> here's my list: the rock, guy fieri, mike myers, bella thorne, kim kardashian, simon cowell, justin bieber, dr. phil, gordan ramsay + more


	30. i i i i i i i i i

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woah.....  
> yankee with no brim................

**12:20AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[rash] WOOOOOOOAAAAH YANKEE WITH NO BRIM  
  
[banker] brim with no yankee :/  
  
[fangirl] YANKEE WITH BRIM  
  
[cerave] no yankee with no brim :(  
  
[the best] What?  
  
[fangirl] all in favor of stan getting a tiktok say "i"  
  
[rash] I  
  
[banker] i  
  
[cerave] i  
  
[rash] I  
  
[aquaphor] i  
  
[rash] I  
  
[fangirl] i  
  
[the best] No  
  
[fangirl] OVERRULED  
  
[fangirl] what r u naming ur account stan  
  
[the best] Nothing. I'm not getting a Tik Tok  
  
[cerave] at least humor us  
  
[the best] Fine. It would probably be StanleyUris  
  
[rash] booooooriiiiiing  
  
[the best] What else would I name it?  
  
[rash] stanleyuranus  
  
[cerave] that sounds like some porn star name  
  
[rash] even better????????  
  
[the best] I am not naming an account StanleyUranus  
  
[fangirl] lose the capitals bud  
  
[the best] stanleyuranus?  
  
[rash] perfect now just put it into tiktok  
  
[the best] I will not  
  
[aquaphor] i will  
  
[fangirl] stan ur email is [stanleyuris@yahoo.com](mailto:stanleyuris@yahoo.com) right  
  
[cerave] god of course they use yahoo  
  
[the best] Yes, it is. Why?  
  
[the best] I am not verifying that account  
  
[fangirl] PLEEEEASE  
  
[aquaphor] stan you could become tiktok famous  
  
[the best] How could I be Tik Tok famous?  
  
[banker] ur pretty, ur bi, u have US as friends, and u have a confusing sense of humor  
  
[the best] Fine. But if it doesn't work, I'm deleting the account  
  
[fangirl] DEAL  
  
[rash] YES STANLEYURANUS IS HAPPENING WOOHOOOOOo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> someone email stanleyuris@yahoo and tell them to make a tiktok account with the user stanleyuranus pls and thanks


	31. roleplay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> possible tw: richie makes a joke about calling eddie a f*iry :-/ to some people it can be triggering so i am sorry
> 
> also no hate to roleplayers!! its cool whatever u like to do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> silly little chapter blossomed from my boredness, thank you corona

**4:37PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
 _rash reset all usernames!_  
  
  
[richie] ello  
  
[beverly] DARK FORCES ARISE  
  
[stanley] Hi  
  
[stanley] Wait, no  
  
[beverly] thank u stan for volunteering i will be at ur house in ten minutes  
  
[stanley] What? Why? What are you planning?  
  
[eddie] sounds like shes doing a satanic ritual  
  
[bill] wouldnt be surprised  
  
[stanley] Beverly  
  
[beverly] yes, stanny? *bats eyes innocently*  
  
[bill] bev ROLEPLAYS u guys osmfjhgfuygahfd  
  
[eddie] STOP DONT DO HER LIKE TAHDTSTDSSHGA  
  
[bill] hello we are all roleplaying for the rest of the day thank you very much   
  
[bill] YOU HAVE TO PARTICIPATE THERES NO OTHER OPTION  
  
[richie] since when do u call the shots  
  
[mike] im on board  
  
[richie] nvm mikes cool with it  
  
[bill] okay starting now  
  
[beverly] u guys r so mean  
  
[eddie] what ever could you mean, bevvy? *bats eyes innocently*  
  
[beverly] *dies*  
  
[richie] NOOOOOOOOOOOO  
  
[richie] YOU KILLED HER *SOBS*  
  
[richie] now we must fight to the death *takes out sword*  
  
[eddie] ha HA you fool i fight with the power of LOVE  
  
[eddie] *kisses ur cheek*  
  
[richie] *dies*  
  
[stanley] What is going on right now??  
  
[bill] *gasp* eddie defeated richie!!  
  
[bill] richie was the fiercest warrior we had  
  
[richie] thank u  
  
[bill] shut up this isnt real  
  
[richie] :(  
  
[stanley] Why is this set in medieval times???  
  
[bill] i must heal him with my magicks  
  
[bill] *makes richie drink potion*  
  
[richie] omg!! IM ALIVE   
  
[richie] i must save the damsel in distress  
  
[bill] who  
  
[richie] stan of course  
  
[stanley] What?  
  
[eddie] NOT IF I GET TO THEM FIRST  
  
  
 _mike changed stanley's name to "royal stan"_  
  
  
[royal stan] I don't want to be a part of this  
  
  
 _mike changed richie's name to "knight tozier"_  
  
  
[knight tozier] HELL YEAH  
  
  
 _mike changed bill's name to "bill the wise"_  
  
  
[bill the wise] what  
  
[mike] ur a wizard  
  
[mike] eddie what r u  
  
[eddie] idk i was thinking a fairy or smth  
  
[knight tozier] why?? bc everyone called u that in 7th grade???  
  
[eddie] SHUT UP!! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!  
  
[knight tozier] haha gay  
  
  
 _mike changed eddie's name to "fairy eds"_  
  
  
[fairy eds] it'll do  
  
[knight tozier] donkey, that'll do  
  
[fairy eds] do u ever think before u send something  
  
[beverly] would u get on with it i wanna see if richie avenges me  
  
[fairy eds] shut up ur DEAD u cant speak  
  
[beverly] *dies again*  
  
[knight tozier] NOOOOOOOOOOOO  
  
[knight tozier] YOU KILLED HER *SOBS*  
  
[knight tozier] now we must fight to the death *takes out sword*  
  
[fairy eds] ha HA you fool i fight with the power of LOVE  
  
[fairy eds] *kisses ur cheek*  
  
[knight tozier] *dies*  
  
[royal stan] What??? Didn't that JUST happen???  
  
[bill the wise] *gasp* eddie defeated richie!!  
  
[bill the wise] richie was the fiercest warrior we had  
  
[royal stan] WHAT IS GOING ON???  
  
[bill the wise] i must heal him with my magicks  
  
[bill the wise] *makes richie drink potion*  
  
[knight tozier] omg!! IM ALIVE   
  
[knight tozier] i must save the damsel in distress  
  
[knight tozier] my happily ever after, stan uris <3333  
  
[royal stan] I'm so confused  
  
[fairy eds] NOT IF I GET TO THEM FIRST  
  
[knight tozier] HA HA YOU FOOL YOUVE ALREADY USED UR POWERS ON ME  
  
[knight tozier] IM IMMUNE NOW  
  
[fairy eds] NOOOOOOOOO  
  
[mike] the two raced towards the castle, battling each other on the way  
  
[knight tozier] STANLEY IM HERE LET DOWN YOUR HAIR  
  
[royal stan] I live in a castle, you can just open the gates  
  
[royal stan] That is, if you can defeat the dragon  
  
[fairy eds] haha loser the dragon is my friend  
  
[knight tozier] NOOOOOOOOO  
  
[royal stan] SHH!! You'll make him mad  
  
[royal stan] Wait what am I doing??? Why am I going along with this????  
  
[beverly] because its fun!!!!  
  
[bill the wise] im boooored  
  
[knight tozier] what it was just getting good  
  
[fairy eds] bye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wait what was bev gonna do with her dark forces arise thing
> 
> -you, now


	32. 4K

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what can i say  
> everyone loves stanley uris

**5:20PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
 _knight tozier reset all usernames!_  
  
  
[richie] hey yall  
  
[stanley] GUYS?????????  
  
[beverly] oh god whats wrong  
  
[stanley] I HAVE 4K FOLLOWERS ON TIKTOK???????????  
  
[mike] WHAT  
  
[eddie] oh my GOD THATS AMAZING  
  
[bill] HOLY SHIT  
  
[richie] WHADAHFFKJHAFKD  
  
[beverly] i knew u could do it  
  
[stanley] I only have five Tik Toks, how is this possible??  
  
[beverly] everyone wants to tap that ass what can i say  
  
[stanley] Ugh, inappropriate, Bev  
  
[beverly] its the TRUTH all of us have thought about u like that  
  
[beverly] except ben  
  
[stanley] WHAT??  
  
[mike] bev, dont embarrass them like that  
  
[eddie] even if it is the truth!!  
  
[stanley] Sorry, I think I'm dying... What??????  
  
[richie] yeah stan ur like.. hot  
  
[stanley] What is going on right now  
  
[bill] sorry stanny :(  
  
[stanley] Sorry? For what? Oh, except that every time I thought you guys were flirting with me I was RIGHT??  
  
[stanley] Sorry this is a lot of information  
  
[stanley] I'm famous on Tik Tok and all of my friends have had a crush on me  
  
[beverly] i mean not to be insensitive or anything but that sounds like the life  
  
[stanley] Oh my God

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another one of my favorite hcs: all the losers have/had the biggest crush on stanley bc how could u not


	33. primary guardians

**3:13PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[beverly] yo  
  
[mike] hi  
  
[bill] how is everyone  
  
[beverly] good  
  
[mike] fine  
  
[eddie] i’m okay, how r u  
  
[bill] vibin  
  
[bill] where r the two dorks  
  
[beverly] on a date <3  
  
[eddie] richie and stan are out on a date?  
  
[beverly] oops idk if i was supposed to tell u that  
  
[stanley] We're not on a date  
  
[richie] ya we're just chilling at my house  
  
[beverly] oof buzzkill ;\  
  
[bill] hey can i come over? parents are being annoying  
  
[richie] sure  
  
[richie] if u guys are free, u can come  
  
[richie] my primary guardians rnt home   
  
[beverly] how is it at home rich?  
  
[richie] same as always: mom and dad don’t really understand me but they’re trying their best  
  
[mike] that’s good  
  
[stanley] Bill, how is it going for you and Georgie?  
  
[bill] going between houses is rough, more for me than georgie. i’m just glad they’re letting us stay together through all of this. dad got a new gf and mom did the same;;; it’s weird adjusting   
  
[beverly] ur mom got a gf?  
  
[bill] yeah, i’m totally supportive but if i just didn’t expect it  
  
[stanley] That’s really cool, I hope things get better with both homes though  
  
[bill] bev how’s it like living with clara?  
  
[beverly] better. definitely better than living with my d*d- she’s super cool  
  
[eddie] that’s great bev :)  
  
[mike] how’s ur house stan?  
  
[stanley] Mom is still cooler than Dad. He’s still a jerk. I confessed to my mom about being enby and she’s supportive. We’re not telling Dad yet, I’m not ready  
  
[eddie] hey, progress right? we’re proud of u stan  
  
[stanley] Thanks. Mike, how are your grandparents?  
  
[mike] oh... they’re fine. mama is getting weaker bc of her sickness and pop is refusing to believe that god has a good reason. i’m obviously going to be sad when she passes but i think she’ll be in a better place and she won’t be in pain anymore  
  
[beverly] awh, i’m sorry mike :( i see both of ur points  
  
[bill] eddie, how’s living with ur uncle?  
  
[eddie] ugh it’s so weird. since mommy left me with him, he’s been bitter. it’s whatever though bc i don’t have to be on pills and i can go out more  
  
[richie] i’m sorry about that eds   
  
[beverly] aw i love you all so much :((( everyone at richies house now so i can give you all big hugs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do u guys want me to write a full literate chapter like "heart wants what it wants"


	34. the office

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i did not have the motivation to write a full literate chapter but ive finally gotten back into writing his series :D

**9:27AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[richie] GUSYSYYSYSTSYSYSYS  
  
[eddie] hi  
  
[bill] aloha  
  
[mike] whats up richie  
  
[richie] I STARTED WATCHING THE OFFICE  
  
[richie] AND NOW I HAVE TO CHANGE OUR NAMES  
  
[bill] OH DUDE I LOVE THE OFFICE  
  
[bill] WHAT EP R U ON  
  
[richie] 621!!!!  
  
[bill] we should watch together  
  
[richie] YES  
  
[beverly] richie u should be angela lol 2 lovers  
  
[richie] Fuck Off  
  
[bill] ryan gives eddie vibes  
  
[beverly] hmm but does he though  
  
[bill] yeah high on crack  
  
[eddie] fuck u bill   
  
[richie] who is overly annoying and makes horrible jokes that are mostly sexual and everyone dislikes   
  
[richie] fuck i just described myself  
  
[beverly] LMAOAOAOAOAO but ur not michael and we don’t dislike u  
  
[richie] wait u guys think i’m annoying  
  
[eddie] oh shoot whats the receptionists name  
  
[mike] pam?  
  
[eddie] nooo the other one  
  
[eddie] like ellie???? angie?????? WTF WHAT IS IT  
  
[eddie] stacy?  
  
[richie] NO ONE TELL HIM LET HIM FIGURE IT OUT  
  
[eddie] my mind keeps going back to pam even though i KNOW ITS NOT PAM  
  
[eddie] it’s the dude’s girlfriend please  
  
[eddie] WHATS HIS NAME  
  
[eddie] ANDY  
  
[beverly] why don’t u just look it up  
  
[mike] no this is entertaining  
  
[eddie] ANDY AND HIS GIRLFRIEND THE RECEPTIONIST..........  
  
[eddie] fuck  
  
  
  
  
  
 **11:09AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[eddie] ITS FUCKING ERIN WHWTYATYSGSGWGW  
  
[eddie] ANDY AND ERIN DUHHHH  
  
[richie] LMAOAOAOAOAOAOO


	35. genderbend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i was dead for so long lol

**2:03PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[richie] man. if eddie was a girl his name would be ellie  
  
[beverly] elward   
  
[bill] LNFAOSODKKD  
  
[richie] eleanor kaspbrak, ellie and el instead of eds  
  
[beverly] u think about this a lot don’t u  
  
[richie] I DO  
  
[richie] i would be rachael tozier  
  
[bill] wtf would i be  
  
[mike] billie eyelash  
  
[richie] belle denbrough DUHH  
  
[bill] hate how well that works  
  
[beverly] what about me  
  
[richie] uhh bradley marsh  
  
[beverly] wait that’s actually kinda good wtf  
  
[stanley] Hello  
  
[richie] for stan i was thinking like stacy or stella something idk  
  
[richie] how do u bend a nonexistent gender  
  
[stanley] Maybe I should just stay a guy...  
  
[beverly] what????? no??? why???   
  
[stanley] It’s easier than saying I’m enby. No one other than you guys really understand. It sucks and some websites don’t have a no gender option so I end up picking guy anyways...  
  
[mike] stanley, no. that shouldn’t be your reason  
  
[eddie] yeah, if u feel like ur a male, be a male. but if ur enby and u know it and u just don’t like how it’s not included that’s not a good reason  
  
[richie] stanny be who u are. not whats easier to be  
  
[bill] stan we’re all a part of the lgbtq+ community ,, i’m sure none of us are going to say we’re straight if we don’t have to  
  
[stanley] Right. You guys are right. Sorry.  
  
[beverly] don’t be sorry stan we all have our doubts  
  
[richie] yeah!!! i sometimes think i like girls but then i remember i only like dick ;)  
  
[stanley] Ugh.  
  
[mike] richie finish the genderbend names  
  
[richie] oh right  
  
[richie] okay so  
ellie kaspbrak (eleanor)  
belle denbrough (isabella)  
bradley marsh  
rachael tozier  
stacy uris  
  
[richie] mike and ben  
  
[richie] mike is michelle hanlon  
  
[richie] ben is .................... i cant think of any girl names that start with b other than bella and beverly  
  
[beverly] bessie  
  
[stanley] That is a cow’s name  
  
[beverly] SHUT UP?  
  
[richie] brianna or bethany  
  
[mike] bethany  
  
[bill] agreed  
  
[richie] beth hanscom (bethany)  
  
[beverly] yay!!! genderbent losers!!!!   
  
[beverly] you guys wouldnt mind if i drew us right  
  
[eddie] that would be so cool???  
  
[richie] OMG BEV YES  
  
[mike] beverly that would be awesome  
  
[bill] yeah that would be kinda amazing  
  
[stanley] It’ll look wonderful  
  
[beverly] ALRIGHT COOL


	36. tik tok

**4:13PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[richie] chicken 🐓 wing 🍗 chicken 🐓 wing 🍗 hotdog 🌭 and bologna ✨ chicken 🐔 and macaroni 🍝 chillin 🥶 with my 😘 homies 👯‍♀️  
  
[mike] doesnt stan have a tiktok account  
  
[bill] OMG YEAH  
  
[eddie] i forgot about that  
  
[beverly] STAN how is ur tiktok acc  
  
[stanley] 500k followers  
  
[beverly] OH MY GOD?????????/  
  
[eddie] HOW DO U DO IT  
  
[stanley] I don't know. I do POVs and I attempt to do comedy and sometimes I do dances  
  
[richie] dont forget me when ur at the top :pensive:  
  
[mike] do u guys not follow him???  
  
[bill] i dont have a tiktok account  
  
[beverly] stan and i collab all the time  
  
[eddie] stan u should start a youtube channel  
  
[stanley] I don't have enough personality for that and I'm not willing to change myself for it  
  
[ben] just do storytimes, you have richie bill and eddie as friends  
  
[bill] hey what did i do  
  
[mike] what Didn’t you do  
  
[bill] shuddup  
  
[eddie] EW  
  
[ben] see  
  
[beverly] hey ben hows your stunningly gorgeous amazing hot girlfriend  
  
[ben] everything you described her as and more  
  
[stanley] Blech.  
  
[richie] STANLEY!!!!!!! THAT WAS SO ADORABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i want to Cry  
  
[mike] stan ur so cute  
  
[beverly] i wish i could be mad  
  
[stanley] I can’t say anything in this group chat


	37. guys?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yall help me out whats an accurate rating for this fic
> 
> aLSo i will be posting more chapters tom. i just wanna leave this on a cliffhanger type thing

**10:51PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[richie] hey guys  
  
  
 **12:24AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**   
  
  
[richie] guys?  
  
  
 **2:14AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[richie] guys come on this isn’t funny. i had a really hard day and i miss you guys  
  
  
 **4:37AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[richie] see you all tomorrow?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> {nothing drastic will happen!! do not freak out, i would never do that in this fic;;;; i dont want to hurt u guys}


	38. theories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi mar lol

**10:51PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[bill] hey guys  
  
[beverly] hello  
  
[eddie] i am so dead tired  
  
[beverly] why???  
  
[eddie] i watched all the dont hug me i’m scared videos last night and i couldn’t sleep  
  
[mike] watch matpats theories it made it a lot less scary  
  
[mike] it’ll be under the film theorists channel  
  
[eddie] oh okay thank you  
  
[bill] i love matpat so much  
  
[mike] me too, his disney theories are so good  
  
[beverly] i had a huge crush on him for such a long time  
  
[beverly] omg mike did u watch the wall-e theory  
  
[mike] THE ONE ABOUT CANNIBALISM   
  
[beverly] YEAH  
  
[mike] YESS I LOVE THAT ONE  
  
[bill] do u guys watch his minecraft theories  
  
[beverly] DUH ITS MF MINECRAFT  
  
[bill] HIS ENDERMAN THEORY WAS SO PERFECT  
  
[mike] i believe all of his theories are correct  
  
[eddie] A KIDS TV SHOW???? WOW????? THAT WORKS SO WELL  
  
[mike] RIGHT  
  
[beverly] <matpat3


	39. water debate

**12:24AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[bill] water is wet  
  
[beverly] WHAT????? UM.........  
  
[mike] FINALLY SOMEONE WHO SEES MY SIDE  
  
[eddie] water isn’t wet??????  
  
[stanley] Yeah, water’s not wet  
  
[ben] water is wet...  
  
[beverly] BEN NO NOT YOU  
  
[beverly] we have to b**** u*  
  
[ben] not this again  
  
[eddie] waters not wet  
  
[stanley] It has the quality to make things wet, but it itself is not wet  
  
[mike] is fire hot  
  
[bill] yes  
  
[beverly] no  
  
[stanley] Again, it has the quality to make things hot, like the air surrounding it, but fire is not hot  
  
[bill] okay u guys must be on some type of drug  
  
[mike] water is wet and fire is hot :sob:  
  
[eddie] bill just loooves stirring up some kinda drama  
  
[bill] guilty  
  
[beverly] waters not wet


	40. between friends

**2:14AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[beverly] IF I LOOPED MY LIFE TO LIVE AGAIN  
  
[beverly] ID PICK MORE LOSERS AND PICK BETTER FRIENDS WHO LIKE TO SLEEP IN THE DAYTIME  
  
[beverly] FALL IN LOVE AND KISS AT NIIiiight with better friends  
  
[beverly] who try to be alright  
  
[beverly] all right  
  
[ben] between friends?  
  
[beverly] YES! YOURE LEARNINF  
  
[eddie] oh i love that one song uhhh affection??  
  
[eddie] oh i’m lookin for affection in all the wrong places  
  
[beverly] AND WE’LL KEEP FALLIN ON EACH OTHER TO FILL THE EMPTY SPAAACESS  
  
[mike] oh um suburban wonderland is a good song  
  
[beverly] ITS OUR SUBURBAN WONDERLAND  
  
[beverly] NEVER NEED A HELPING HAND  
  
[beverly] DAYS AND NIGHTS THEY ALWAYS CHANGE BUT YOU AND I JUST STAY THE SAME  
  
[bill] whats that one song  
  
[bill] ILOVEYOU  
  
[bill] HOT BOX QUIET TALKS  
  
[beverly] SWIMMING POOLS WITH NIGHT OUT  
  
[bill] SKIN SWEET INCOMPLETE  
  
[beverly] BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I LIKE  
  
[bill] I LOVE YOU TENDERLY TRAAAGICALLY  
  
[stanley] What  
  



	41. dry water

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay this should be enough content logging out for like 87654323345678 weeks

**4:37AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[richie] see you all tomorrow?  
  
[beverly] RICHIE WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN FOR THE PAST FEW HOURS  
  
[richie] WHAT  
  
[richie] OMG  
  
[richie] HIIIIIIII  
  
[mike] what is going on  
  
[bill] RICHIE SETTLE A DEBATE FOR US  
  
[eddie] god not this again  
  
[beverly] YOURE STILL ON THIS????  
  
[stanley] Didn’t this debate happen like three years ago?  
  
[bill] IS WATER WET  
  
[richie] no  
  
[bill] WHAT  
  
[beverly] YEAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
  
[stanley] Thank you, Richie  
  
[eddie] SEE THIS IS WHY RICHIES DICK IS BIG  
  
[richie] WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS IM CRYIGNDHDHD  
  
[ben] mike, bill, and i believe water is wet   
  
[bill] right water isn’t mf dry  
  
[beverly] how do u know  
  
[bill] it doesn’t make things dry  
  
[bill] a dry towel drys things and gets itself wet  
  
[bill] a wet towel makes other things wet and stays wet  
  
[beverly] wait is water wet  
  
[eddie] BEV NO HES TALKING ABOUT FABRICS FABRIC HAS THE ABILITY TO BE DRY AND WET WATER ISNT WET NOR DRY  
  
[beverly] omg  
  
[beverly] i almost went to the dark side


	42. a dora bowl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi

**12:08PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[stanley] Hey guys  
  
[richie] hi stanny  
  
[richie] hey stanley your  
  
[richie] {picture of a bowl with dora on it}  
  
[richie] get it? a-dora-bowl?? like adorable ;))))  
  
[stanley] You’re*  
  
[richie] aww thanks babe  
  
[stanley] Don't call me that, we're not dating  
  
[richie] NOT YET!!!  
  
[bill] r u guys done flirting  
  
[beverly] yeah get a room  
  
[mike] oh you’re one to talk  
  
[eddie] “hey ben hows your stunningly gorgeous amazing hot girlfriend”  
  
[beverly] i was technically flirting with myself  
  
[bill] “everything you described her as and more”  
  
[beverly] “[richie] STANLEY!!!!!!! THAT WAS SO ADORABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i want to Cry [mike] stan ur so cute”  
  
[stanley] “[beverly] i wish i could be mad”  
  
[beverly] dammit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes this is the extended summary


	43. spaghetti

**1:16PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**  
  
  
[richie] I MISS MY MOOOOOMMMMM  
  
[beverly] where is she?  
  
[richie] she’s at work  
  
[mike] when does she get back  
  
[richie] in like four hours :((((( i want one of her hugs  
  
[ben] why not hang out with your dad?  
  
[richie] he’s watching tv and won’t pay attention to me and i crave attention   
  
[beverly] come to my house  
  
[beverly] clara is cooking pasta  
  
[richie] what kind  
  
[beverly] spaghetti  
  
[richie] EDDIE SPAGHETTI HAHAHAH  
  
[eddie] HAHAHAH WOW UR SO FUNNY 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂   
  
[richie] yeah beverly i’ll come over  
  
[beverly] YAY all of u are invited  
  
[eddie] i will come  
  
[richie] you’ll WHAT wwOAH EDDIE TMI :flushed:  
  
[eddie] SHUT UP!! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
[richie] LMFAOOOOOOO  
  
[eddie] BEEP FUCKING BEEP  
  
[richie] hey :(  
  
[eddie] grrrrr bark bark  
  
[bill] EDDIES A FURRY????:?:)2&:838:)/!:?:!  
  
[eddie] NOOOOO ITS JUST A THING I SAY PLELALDEKKEKDKDKD  
  
[beverly] on all levels except physical, he is a wolf  
  
[eddie] STOP

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the first chapter ive used emojis nd its just bc im too lazy to write :joy: over and over again  
> also its an inside joke lol


	44. weed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> these last two chapters are really just fillers so i can end this fic  
> its been a wild ride and im so happy you guys have stuck with me--
> 
> i'll say more on the last chapter :)

**3:22PM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**   
  
  
[richie] does stan love me do i promise  
  
[stanley] What  
  
[beverly] DO U GUYS EVER THINK ABOUT HOW  
  
[mike] what  
  
[beverly] hi  
  
[bill] WHAT  
  
[eddie] hi like High LOL  
  
[richie] omg r eddie and bev HIGH  
  
[ben] yes please help  
  
[beverly] what no we r not drugs r BAD  
  
[eddie] good thing weed is a plant B)  
  
[richie] i have never felt so left out in MY LIFE  
  
[stanley] Ben, how did this happen?  
  
[ben] bev and i were hanging out and then eddie came over and they just started smoking  
  
[mike] i’ll come over rn  
  
[bill] NOOO DOnt STOP THE FUNNNN  
  
[beverly] look i’m stan Goodbye, I am not cute and I type stupidly  
  
[stanley] I don’t type like that  
  
[stanley] Wait


	45. goodnight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahh the last chapter to this ridiculously long fic

**2:39AM**  
 **stan loves me i promise**   
  
  
[stanley] I’m tired  
  
[beverly] sleep  
  
[stanley] Okay. Goodnight, guys. Love you all, see you tomorrow   
  
[mike] i’m signing off as well goodnight all love u guys  
  
[eddie] me Too bc i don’t want to be left out love y’all  
  
[bill] WAIT I WANNA JOIN TOO goodnight farewell love u  
  
[richie] this is so weird i’m gonna sleep too now love you !!!!! <3333  
  
[beverly] UH?? OKAY GOODNIGHT LOVE YOU GUYS HAVE SWEET DREAMS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes, this is how im ending it. all of the losers are SLEEP  
> i dont think ive written the losers saying goodnight to each other which is a routine thing in my gc so i feel like this is a good way to end it
> 
> dont worry you guys, im creating a sequel!! it'll have more of a storyline and it will make sense this time  
> im also thinking about creating a prequel of seeing how the losers met, that could be funnn
> 
> yeah! i hope you enjoyed this dumb crack fic, it's the first time ive actually finished one of these lol  
> thank you for all of the support, i love you all!!


End file.
